Santa Claus

So last year, I wrote this whole blog on Myspace (I wasn't cool enough to be here yet) about how much I loved being Santa Claus.

This year, it's a whole different experience for me.

Stephen figured out at Easter time this year that The Easter Bunny wasn't real. It took him about 30 seconds from there to figure out Santa, and the Tooth Fairy was quick to follow... He was so proud of himself. I made a big deal to him about not telling anyone else, because I didn't want him to ruin it for his friends. We made it kind of like our little secret...

Then, this week, he was dressed up in red for decoration day at school, and wearing a Santa Hat... He loves funky hats. Go figure. My boss' son (2 years old) came in to see her at the end of the day, and he was eyeing this foam airplane Stephen had. So I asked Stephen to give it to him... He just STARED at Stephen. I finally decided that he was giving Nicholas a gift, and he looked enough like Santa that that's what Nicholas thought. How cool is that? So I made it a point to tell Stephen that's what Santa is all about... that feeling you get when you give someone something, and it makes them so happy. He was into that. He also decided we could give my sister one of her gifts in her stocking, and that would be cool. So then today he 'bought' me some stuff for my stocking when we were at the store.

So he doesn't believe any more. But I don't think he's READY to not believe, you know? I think, emotionally, he'd like to hang on for at least another year. Man, I wish he had. When he's a little off-guard, he'll just say something like "How does Santa...?" or "At the North Pole..."

Then we're on the way to church tonight when I see some deer across the street in someone's yard. I told him, and he got all excited. He said "They must be Santa's Reindeer" That PROVES it. He IS real." Two minutes later, we pass a house that has a Santa sleigh decoration on their roof. He got all excited that he'd seen Santa.

I think he WANTS to believe, you know? His heart and his head are not communicating at all. And even though I've blown it and flat out TOLD him he was right, he's still trying so hard to believe.
He reminds me of a little kid whose big brother tells him that Santa's not real, so they KNOW, but aren't ready... So they're in a bit of denial. Well, Stephen's doing the same thing, but it was his own silly self who ruined it for him. He just thinks so logically (The whole thing blew up over the Easter Bunny hopping on 2 feet in a book, and that wasn't possible)...he ruined it for himself, and doesn't know how to deal with it.

Either way, though, I think he's enjoying the "being Santa" part as much as I do.

I hope you all have a very Blessed and Merry Christmas, and we'll talk soon.